I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
