smell my finger.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
