I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Is Oprah even human
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
