when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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