16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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