even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
