She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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