if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
