Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
The air taste purple.
Randomize
