That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
