Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
