Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
My vagina is very pro this idea
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
