Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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