The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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