everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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