thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
whose parrot is this?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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