okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
