Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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