Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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