I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
