adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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