I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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