If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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