Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
