Screwed.edu
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
