My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
