MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
not ubering you a puppy
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize