I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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