Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
