Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
