Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
it's great music for shaving your balls
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
