i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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