"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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