So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
