Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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