Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
