i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Randomize
