i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
whose parrot is this?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I believe in your delicious
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
