I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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