She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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