What a fucking waste of an outfit
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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