I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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