I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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