There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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