he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
