Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
