Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I have fence marks all over my body
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
