im gay
i know
yea but for you.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
