Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
