I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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